Fish Tales

I know what you think when you open the refrigerator and stare into it. Your eyes rest on the vegetables mingling on the shelves and in the draws. You notice the way your radishes are softening, your beet greens are wilting, your scallions are browning, and your shitake mushrooms are melting. You think, “What a goddamn shame.”

You have done your best to avoid wasting food. You plead with Eric to take leftovers to work with him rather than allowing him to buy his lunches. You make a fresh vegetable dish every night. You reuse and recycle what you can. But you are only one human being. There are only so many meals you can eat in a day. There are only so many recipes you can conjure from the depths of your rapidly-growing cookbook collection. Those vegetables begin dying the day they enter your refrigerator. You can’t win the battle against time.

But you are bound and determined to go out with a fight. Hastily, you reach into that refrigerator and grab at everything which won’t last a day more. Frantically, you begin chopping. Clumsily, you toss your orgy of vegetables into the food processor. With a little olive oil and a manly dose of garlic, you puree. You pulse. You taste. You reach for the spices. You puree. You pulse. You taste.

You smile. It’s good. Real good. You do a little victory dance. Thank the gods for the invention of the food processor. And then you name your art. Despite the fact that you are alone, you talk aloud. “I’ll name it ‘Olive You Madly Dip’.” It’s a good name.

Olive You Madly Dip now sits in a plastic container in the refrigerator. It is waiting its ultimate test: The Husband. If he doesn’t like it, he will nod his head and politely say, “It’s good. No really. It is.” If he loves it, his eyes will grow wide as they do every time he bites into something delicious and he will say, “Oh Aubbie! This is good!” And he too will do a dance.

I got in.

The Pacific College of Oriental Medicine accepted my application yesterday. I start classes on the 28th of April.

My first semester involves seven classes: Tai Ji 1, Clinical Counseling 1, Medical Terminology, Biology, Anatomy 1, Foundations of Chinese Medicine, and Fundamentals of Chinese Medicine 1.

It’s going to be tough. But I am looking forward to it.

The Casbah, a music venue here in San Diego, has a set of instructions posted on their pool tables detailing the procedure for inserting coins:

Push all the way in.
Pull out.
Then push in again.

I felt compelled to jot these instructions down as they seemed to have a certain underlying significance.

I dropped my wife at the airport this morning where she boarded a plane bound for Baltimore. I kissed her goodbye and told her I would see her next week. It didn’t really hit me until this evening that she would be gone for an entire week. We have been together pretty much every day for the past 2+ years. Now that she is not here, I have no idea what to do with myself. So I thought, “I’ll just do things that I can’t normally do because I am not often alone in our home.” After squatting a grumpy with the bathroom door open, I was fresh out of ideas.

This is going to be a long week.

It was in the low 70s in San Diego today. I changed into a pair of shorts and a long sleeve shirt. I regretted the long sleeve shirt. It is to remain in the low 70s for the next two days. Tomorrow, Eric and I will spend the morning and afternoon planting seeds at the organic farm that produces the food we receive every week through the CSA program we participate in. I am thinking shorts and a tank top for that gig.

On Monday, I am flying home to Baltimore. My brother informed me today that it will be in the low 20s when I arrive. Good God Almighty! I am going to freeze! In fact, it may take some coercion on my brother’s part to even get me to exit the airport. In San Diego, I shiver uncontrollably when the temperature plummets below 60. How am I going to survive the 20s?

ANNOUNCER VOICE: Aubry, now that you have completed an entire admissions packet in two days time, what are you going to do next? And Eric, now that you have completed a sixty-hour work week, what are you going to do next?

AUBRY & ERIC (in unison): We’re going to Disneyland!!!

Seriously. Back in a few days.